Lessons from Leo IV
Leo—my family’s extra-sweet and quirky fox-colored yellow lab—turns four today, which means it’s time for the fourth installment of “Lessons from Leo.” I feel enormously grateful for our adorable pup, who brings much joy and entertainment into our lives while continually teaching me important life lessons.
4-year-old Leo
Recently, I was elated to discover that Leo’s puppy paperwork includes his birth time. This made it possible for me to create a complete astrological birth chart for him, and I was completely blown away by how accurately his chart illustrates his unique personality. It is this finding that kicks off my lessons from Leo in 2023:
1) Astrology works for dogs. In my very first “Lessons from Leo,” I enthused about how I’ve never met a more loving or gentle dog than Leo. Well, it turns out that Leo has four planets in Libra—the zodiac sign ruled by Venus, the planet of love. Not only is his Sun in Libra, so is his Moon (his emotional nature), his Venus (how he loves), and his Mercury (the way he thinks). Leo can also be very indecisive—repeatedly asking to be let outside one minute, then scratching the door to get back in seconds later—a common Libra trait.
Leo’s extreme quirkiness can be explained by the fact that his most elevated planet is Uranus. The most elevated planet at the time of our birth indicates characteristics we strongly display in the world, and Uranus is the planet of eccentricity, individuality, and revolution. Uranus is also the planet of rebellion, which helps explains why exceptionally sweet Leo is actually not a very obedient or compliant dog. He seems to believe that leashes are meant to pull people wherever he wants to go, and if he’s not in the mood to do something, no amount of cajoling will get him to acquiesce.
I was especially thrilled to discover an adorable coincidence: Leo’s rising sign is Leo. Leo risings are known for their joyful and playful orientation to life, so it’s not a surprise that Leo has an exuberant and sunny disposition that inspires me to reconnect with my own childlike light-heartedness and glee.
2) Always lead with kindness and respect. A couple of months ago, while I was tugging at Leo’s leash and angrily hollering “NO LEO, NO!” during my failed attempts to get him to stop eating an ornamental plant, my husband called out to me that Leo responds better to “please” and “thank you” than he does to harsh tones and angry words. I gave this alternative method a try: “Please stop Leo. Please come Leo. Good boy Leo!” Not only was it more effective, it felt much better. Admittedly, my husband and I have not done a good job training our dogs (it’s hard to stay motivated when you live on a fenced farm and your dogs are especially headstrong), but what has stayed with me is how much better it feels to lead with gentleness and kindness instead of anger and frustration. This revelation continues to affect how I interact with Leo, as well as with the humans in my life.
Leo communing with Myra’s grandson, Feliciano
3) Honor your sensitivities. In addition to being emotionally sensitive, Leo is also physically sensitive, with a number of food and environmental allergies that need careful managing. We are continually adjusting his food, supplements and medication, and he needs a thorough bath every week. If we ignore any of this, his skin turns red, and he gets so itchy that he can rub off his fur from scratching so much. As someone who is also emotionally and physically sensitive, it’s easy for me to feel self-critical, especially when my requirements inconvenience others. Watching Leo thrive under the right conditions highlights the impact of generously and unapologetically giving ourselves the particular care we need to foster our optimum health and happiness. Leo teaches me the importance of cultivating acceptance and compassion for the entirety of who we naturally are.
4) You must be willing to disappoint others when you do what you want. For years, one of my most treasured simple pleasures came at the end of the day, when my husband and I would get into bed with our two dogs, Henry and Leo, for a long cuddle session before going to sleep. But for the past few months, Leo hasn’t wanted to join us. With two spare bedrooms now that our kids are both grown, Leo suddenly began to prefer having his own bed with plenty of space to stretch out. If I manage to lure him into our bedroom, he’ll just stand at the door until I give up and set him free.
Although I’m still hoping that this is only a temporary situation, Leo is teaching me that we often cannot help but disappoint others when we prioritize doing what we want. Causing disappointment has always been very difficult for me, but I am working on developing more tolerance for this type of emotional discomfort. Leo is also reminding me that change often happens unexpectedly, so I shouldn’t take anything for granted. Now, every single night I express my gratitude to Henry for always staying by my side.
5) All of us get triggered by something. There is a dog on the other side of our fence that we have never seen, but who barks madly whenever Leo, Henry and I pass by on our farm walks. Although Leo has a notably sweet and non-violent nature, as soon as this mystery dog starts up, Leo runs over, barking furiously. Hair raised, Leo proceeds to jump at the fence over and over again with all his might, fortunately failing in his repeated attempts to knock it down.
Leo’s unexpected behavior makes me recall a story my Zen teacher, Katherine Thanas, once shared about going home for a family visit during the holidays. She had recently been ordained as a Zen priest and thought herself quite enlightened. But once she was back at home, all her old triggers unexpectedly resurfaced with great force, and she was extremely humbled. Katherine wanted her students to understand that all of us are perennially works-in-progress, and also that the reactions others incite are essentially within us to begin with. Every time we pass that fence, Leo reminds me that we are all set off by something, and that investigating our triggers is a huge opportunity for increased self-awareness and personal growth.
6) Savor what you love. Leo and Henry are happy whenever I prep vegetables because I always share scraps with them. They both especially love endive and lettuce. On the occasions when I give them each an especially big piece, Henry gobbles his up quickly, immediately eager for his next treat. In contrast, Leo exits the kitchen with his prize, walks over to his dog bed, lies down, and proceeds to relish his treat in a slow, relaxed manner. Leo demonstrates that rather than it being about how much you get, true pleasure is about how much you are able to enjoy and savor what you have.
Thank you for all the great life lessons, Leo.
Happy 4th birthday!
