Storing Up for Winter
Myra’s grandkids, Feliciano and Amada, reading the book Frederick
I recently read my grandchildren a book by Leo Lionni called Frederick, a story about a little field mouse who, instead of working hard to gather corn, nuts and wheat for the winter months like the other mice in his family, just sits on a large stone gazing at the countryside in contemplation. The first time he is asked reproachfully why he isn’t working, he replies, “I do work. I gather sun rays for the cold dark winter days.” On subsequent days, Frederick explains that he is gathering colors because winter is gray, and words because winter days pass slowly. Although his efforts are not initially appreciated, by mid-winter—after the food stores are depleted and the monotony of dark grey days begins to take their toll—it is Frederick who is able entertain the struggling mice with lovely poems, and guide them to visualize the sun’s glow, which warms them as if by magic.
As many of us are heading into winter already emotionally depleted by the relentless hardships we’ve endured thus far in 2020, this sweet tale, written more than fifty years ago, is a perfect reminder of the importance of keeping our spirits up—endeavoring to feed our souls as well as our physical bodies.
As rates of stress, anxiety, and depression are steadily rising, I have redoubled my efforts to closely monitor my emotional reserves so I can maintain my optimism and resilience. This means paying attention to what drains me and what refuels me, and then actively trying to protect myself from too much of the former, while making every effort to give myself more of the latter.
Creating a list of both categories has helped me stay conscious about making better choices about how I spend my time and energy. Everyone’s will be different—and I hope you get inspired to do an inventory of your own—but here are some of things I’ve noticed that rapidly deplete my emotional reserves:
Being overscheduled
Rushing
Working too long without a break
Unrelenting intake of the news
Over engagement with my electronic devices
Interpersonal conflicts
Being sleep deprived
Not resting when I’m tired
Missing any of my daily self-care practices
Letting my blood sugar drop
Feeling worried or anxious
Myra’s enjoyment of adorable photos of Hank—her new grand-baby puppy who lives in NYC—helps her stay emotionally “fueled.”
When it comes to what refuels me—anything that helps me settle into the present moment and feel good—the more things on this list I can make time to enjoy every day, the better:
Enjoying the beauty of nature, including the cycles of day and night
Dancing (and also cleaning the house) to high-volume upbeat music
Relaxing, resting, napping, doing nothing except gazing around
Playing games (including doing puzzles with 100 pieces or less)
Jokes and laughter, especially watching comedy on television with my husband at the end of the day (our current favorite: Ted Lasso, starring Jason Sudeikis).
Playing with my dogs and petting them (especially when they are freshly washed) and enjoying cuteness (especially young children and puppies)
Long hugs
Writing and learning new, fascinating things that spark my imagination and sense of awe and wonder
Walking, gentle exercise, Qigong-based self-care practices
Meditating and guided meditations, especially with a focused positive purpose in groups, likes Circles of Light
Although I am just beginning to strengthen my “choose all that brings me joy” muscles, my father was very adept at it. He recognized the deep nourishment that comes from beauty and happiness, and he always turned towards it like a flower towards the sun. My dad was never bashful about doing what he loved, and he savored every moment of it, which, according to top happiness researchers, is a very important key to living a happy life (as are gratitude, acceptance and connection).
My father was an example of someone who brought joy and peace wherever he went because he truly embodied those qualities. Here is one of his affirmations from Quest for Eternal Sunshine that demonstrates how he chose to live his life, and inspires me to follow in his footsteps.
I Go for It
I want all that is delightful and makes my heart rejoice.
I choose that which is beautiful and makes me smile.
I embrace all that is loving and kind.
I go for what inspires me to sing, dance, and celebrate life!
Wishing everyone a Happy Thanksgiving—no matter what form it takes during this unusual year—a time filled with joy, peace and love. With gratitude to each of you for all the goodness you bring into the world.
Myra
