Let Your Inner Child Guide You
“Don’t walk too far away from the child within you, and never abandon the sense of wonder that magnifies the smallest of things into mountains of joy. For one day, when you lose sight of happiness, that child within can guide you back to the things that once nourished your heart.”―Dodinsky
When I discovered the above quote, I instantly thought of my father, Mendek Rubin. The subtitle of our book, Quest for Eternal Sunshine: A Holocaust Survivor’s Journey from Darkness to Light, refers to my dad’s emergence from a life of suffocating depression and despair into one of joy, beauty, and vibrant spiritual connection. Perhaps the most impactful step in his healing journey was reconnecting with his inner child.
For most of his adult life, my father rejected and ignored his inner child, blaming that part of himself for his fears, shame, and insecurities.
He wrote:
Without my inner child, life had been a dreary affair; I’d lacked both roots to my past and enthusiasm about my future. The years I had denied the child within me were like a wasteland where nothing blossomed.
Over time, as I was able to fully embrace the little boy in me, I became a different person. It was the child in me who had always held my essential nature. Although I had forgotten, repressed, and denied this truth for so long, I’d come to this earth with the gift of freedom and the memory of the spark of the divine. That’s why the little boy in me had always refused to accept life as merely the struggle to cope and survive…
Finally, I understood that I needed to bow in reverence to the little boy in me, not the other way around. My inner child helped me begin to trust my heart more than I trusted my mind. Only then could I stop believing in the limited world I saw through the eyes of my conditioning, and finally experience marvels beyond what my five senses could perceive or my brain could explain.
Myra’s father Mendek with her two children, Jeff and Marea, on their farm, circa 1995
My father believed it was the spark of light within his inner child—never fully extinguished despite all he had endured—that kept urging him forward in his quest for happiness, never letting him give up. Connecting to his inner child’s curiosity, sense of wonder, and ability to abandon himself unreservedly to love and joy ultimately transformed his world into a brighter and more delightful place.
One of the ways my father developed an intimate and trusting relationship with his inner child was by having regular conversations with him. He would imagine sitting close beside his younger self, holding his little hand, and promising that he would never again reject, ignore, or feel ashamed of him. My father would tell his inner child, “No matter what, I will always love and accept you exactly as you are. Please let me know how I can be a better friend and stronger ally.”
So in the spirit of today’s theme—allowing our inner child to guide us back to our essential nature, to the person we were before the world told us who we should and should not be—here’s a little exercise inspired by my father.
Talk to Your Inner Child
Take a moment to picture yourself as a child. Search for a time you were happy, curious, playful, or filled with wonder. Make the memory more vivid by bringing in your senses. Maybe you can remember an item of clothing, a scent, a texture, or a view. If nothing comes to mind, simply imagine a scene that evokes feelings of delight.
Now introduce yourself to your inner child, perhaps sharing your age and a little about who you’ve become. Then ask them the following questions, listening patiently for whatever arises.
What do you want me to remember?
What have I forgotten that once brought me joy?
Is there something special you’d love for us to do together today or sometime soon?
How can I be a better friend and stronger ally?
Once you are done, thank your inner child for their honesty, and tell them how much you love and appreciate them. Before you return to your day, choose one small way to honor your inner child’s sense of wonder—allowing the child within to guide you back to something that once nourished your heart.
