At the Intersection of Endings and Beginnings
This New Year’s Eve will be the sixty-third I’ve logged in my life so far. I still feel a spark of excitement every time the calendar turns, but for my four- and eight-year-old grandsons, it’s nothing short of momentous—like a birthday, but one that everyone celebrates together. Just the permission to stay up until midnight turns their familiar world delightfully upside down.
In a recent conversation with therapist and meditation teacher Katie Dutcher, she told me that she loves the end of the year because of the opportunities it presents for self-contemplation and personal growth. “I always try to take full advantage of the coming of a new year—a time when the past, present, and future come together in a meaningful way.” There is a magic we can tap into at the intersection of endings and beginnings.
Every year end, Katie embarks on a ritual she created to help her reflect upon the past year, acknowledge what’s present in her life right now, and dream about the future she wants to consciously create.
“It feels empowering to take on this project each December,” Katie says. “Not only does it give me a clearer sense of the main themes of the past year and how they shaped me, it also serves as a symbol of self-responsibility—my commitment to self-growth and self-care. It’s one of the ways I cultivate intentionality and meaning in my life.”
Katie’s approach sounded so intriguing and beneficial, that I plumbed her for more information so I could break it down for any of us to try.
Katie’s Year-End Contemplation Ritual
Look back
Katie says that looking back “helps to make visible what’s hard to see during the day-to-day: change, growth, non-linear progress in the development of what it means to be me.” To help remember what happened in the past year, Katie spends time reading through her journals, leafing through her calendar, and scrolling through her photos—and she takes notes as she goes.
“As I look back,” Katie says, “I always feel surprised. Things that had seemed almost insurmountable while they were occurring are now almost forgotten. I marvel at something I set as a far-reaching goal that is now accomplished, some area of my life that has changed drastically, or a precious experience I’d all but forgotten. Through the prism of time, context, and perspective, I am also reframing some stories, emphasizing what was not always clear in the moment—in essence, making meaning.”
Questions Katie asks herself about the past year include:
What were my biggest struggles?
What accomplishments can I celebrate?
What are my sweetest memories?
Acknowledge the present
After looking back, it’s important to pause and take the time to contemplate where we are in our lives right now. Katie explains that sometimes it’s helpful to name this season or era, such as, “This is a time of adjustment,” or “This is a time of grief or recovery,” or “This a time filled with adventure and new opportunities that are expanding my horizons.”
Katie says that she lets herself really sit with whatever is going on and fully acknowledge it. “For example, if I made it through something challenging and it took courage, I can declare, ‘I am someone who showed courage!’ and be with the emotions and body sensations that arise. If I feel grief and sadness, I acknowledge and create space for this as well. Just letting myself fully be with whatever is present here and now without judgment is an act of self-love, self-respect, and self-awareness.”
Questions Katie asks herself about the present include:
How am I different now from the person I was a year ago?
What feels tender, unfinished, or in need of extra care right now?
What are my greatest joys? What feels like a gift?
Katie;s New Year’s 2023 collage
Set Intentions for the future
While we can never know exactly what the future will bring, Katie says contemplating how she wants to feel in the new year can be very productive and powerful. “We don’t know what’s going to happen this year, or even this month, but we can determine the direction we want to head, in terms of our feelings or behaviors.”
Katie asks herself the following questions about the future:
How do I want to feel emotionally and physically, and what conditions or actions would foster this?
Where do my energy and excitement want to take me?
What would I be doing if I leaned into what is calling to me, not what I think I should be doing?
As the book on 2025 is about to close, Katie has inspired me to use this threshold to take the time to pause, look honestly at where I’ve been, honor where I am right now, and listen for what wants to emerge next. Watching my grandsons greet the New Year with wide eyes and boundless excitement, I realize one of my intentions for 2026 is to nurture my own childlike sense of wonder, and refuse to let the passing of years dull my ability to experience awe.
Wishing everyone joy, peace, and health in the New Year!
Myra
