Forgiving people who have caused us pain is challenging. When I’m not offered an effusive apology, forgiving rarely comes easily for me. My emotional underbelly is very tender, and old wounds tend to keep their sting. That’s why I’ve recently turned to my father’s teachings about the power of forgiveness.

Fourth of July makes me think about freedom—what it means, what it promises, and how hard it is to achieve. 246 years after the passage of the Declaration of Independence, we are still far from realizing the ideals of liberty and equality it proudly articulated.

Today, in honor of Father’s Day, I’m featuring something special: “Grandpa Says”—a song that shares my father’s philosophy and loving heart in the most delightful way. It’s performed by his talented granddaughter, Nina Harmer, and features footage of my father with my sister and me from the early 1960s, as well with his grandchildren from their birth until the end of his life.

“You don’t see the world as it is—you see the world as you are.” This ancient piece of wisdom from the Talmud is something my father discovered for himself during his healing journey. As he worked through his trauma from childhood and the Holocaust while retraining his mind to let go of suffering and embrace joy, he came to realize that the bleak, indifferent universe he’d lived in for decades was actually the result of his own projections.